Chapter 1: Introduction to Minimalism and Relationships

Many individuals familiar with minimalism or simple living have likely heard of "The Minimalists," Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. This dynamic duo operates a popular blog and hosts a podcast dedicated to the idea that a simpler life can lead to greater happiness.

Their most recent book, Love People, Use Things: Because The Opposite Never Works, caught my attention after a year of engaging with their podcast and watching their documentary, MINIMALISM, on Netflix. Millburn and Nicodemus assert that we maintain seven primary relationships throughout our lives. Each chapter explores these relationships and suggests ways to enhance them, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling existence.

Relationship #1: Stuff

The Minimalists kick off their discussion with our connection to material possessions. The items we own can clutter not just our surroundings but also our minds, diverting our attention from what genuinely matters. By decluttering our physical space, we can better focus on our priorities.

Relationship #2: Truth

“As we begin to sort through our excess possessions, we are often confronted by a cascade of profound and unexpected truths.” — The Minimalists.

Acknowledging personal truths varies for each individual; however, once recognized, they cannot be overlooked. Sometimes we become too complacent in situations that hinder our growth—and potentially that of others. Accepting these truths is the first step toward personal development.

Relationship #3: Self

Understanding what truly matters requires self-reflection. How can we care for ourselves to be better for those around us? The Minimalists reference Simon Marshall, Ph.D.'s SEEDS framework (Sleep, Exercise, Eating, Drinking, and Stress Management). By evaluating our self-care practices, we enhance our well-being and, in turn, benefit those close to us.

Relationship #4: Values

While our specific values may differ, we all share foundational principles: health, relationships, creativity, growth, and contribution. Relationship #3 emphasizes self-care, while Relationship #4 encourages us to assess whether our actions align with our values. If they don’t, what changes can we implement to bridge that gap?

Relationship #5: Money

Millburn and Nicodemus acknowledge the complexities of our relationship with money. Growing up in low-income households, they initially believed that an increase in income would resolve their problems. Yet, as their earnings grew, so did their spending, often leading to financial stress. Understanding and managing our finances is crucial for cultivating a healthier relationship with money.

Relationship #6: Creativity

“You learn just how loud your thoughts are when you turn down the volume of everything around you.” — The Minimalists.

By decluttering our mental and physical environments, we create space to hear our own thoughts. Reducing distractions allows us to tap into our creative potential. Everyone possesses creativity; however, consumer culture often diverts our focus from self-expression, leading to further clutter.

Relationship #7: People

Our social circles consist of primary, secondary, and peripheral relationships. Primary relationships include our closest friends and family, while secondary ones are less intimate connections. Peripheral relationships encompass acquaintances and distant friends. A useful exercise is to list the people in your life and visualize where they fit in this spectrum.

By assessing these seven relationships, we can enhance both our personal growth and overall quality of life. Love People, Use Things reminds us that minimalism extends beyond material possessions; it emphasizes the importance of valuing people over things.

Chapter 2: Practical Applications

The first video, "5 Relationship Maintenance Tips To Beat The 7 Year Itch," offers insightful strategies for nurturing long-term relationships. It emphasizes the importance of communication, shared experiences, and understanding in maintaining healthy connections.

The second video, "Relationships with Enneagram 7s," delves into the dynamics of relationships involving individuals with this personality type, providing viewers with tips on fostering understanding and connection.