A Call for Respect: Addressing Gender Bias Against Boys
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Chapter 1: The Inequities Faced by Our Sons
Having raised three sons and a daughter, I've come to realize that my daughter will inevitably confront inequalities that my sons will likely avoid. When I first held my baby girl, I understood that I would need to prepare her for difficult realities, including discussions about consent and personal safety.
However, I was blindsided by the fact that my sons would also experience unfair treatment—often from well-meaning women who seemed unaware of their actions. It was shocking to learn that when my strong, respectful sons expressed their boundaries, they were often dismissed or ridiculed.
This leads me to share a couple of eye-opening experiences.
Section 1.1: The Changing Room Incident
In a local youth theater group, there were instances where mothers would casually enter the room while teenage boys were changing. When the boys voiced their discomfort, the mothers would laugh it off, citing their previous experiences with diapers. After my son shared his feelings about this incident, I regrettably downplayed their behavior.
He posed a thought-provoking question: "Mom, how would you feel if a dad walked into the girls' changing room?" That question has stayed with me ever since.
Subsection 1.1.1: An Image of Awareness
Section 1.2: Inappropriate Comments
Another incident occurred in a different theater group, where a mother complimented my son while styling his hair, saying, "If I were just a few years younger, I’d be all over you." After he relayed this to me, I didn't take action. Instead, I dismissed it as her way of being complimentary.
Reflecting on this now, I wonder: what if a father had made a similar comment to a teenage girl? The response would likely have been very different.
Chapter 2: Understanding Male Experiences
In the first video titled "This One is for the BOYS," we explore the critical need for recognizing the challenges boys face in a society often focused on women's issues. This video sheds light on how cultural norms can overlook or trivialize the struggles of young men, urging viewers to advocate for their respect and dignity.
The second video, "David J - FOR THE BOYS [Official Video]," further delves into the emotional landscape of boys and men, emphasizing the necessity for a dialogue that includes their experiences and perspectives. It calls for a collective effort to ensure that respect is a two-way street in discussions about gender.
Last night, one of my daughter’s male friends expressed his frustration at being inappropriately touched by women. She wisely empathized with him, stating, "Dude, I’m so sorry. Women know what that feels like." When she mentioned this to me, I was taken aback to learn that he was, in fact, security at the venue.
Reflecting on my own college graduation, a keynote speaker once noted that "we cannot trade one form of prejudice for another." I wish I had been more aware of my sons' experiences with sexism. They deserve to feel safe and respected.
Ladies, it's time to awaken to the reality that sexism can affect anyone, regardless of gender. Men have the right to be treated with respect. It is unacceptable to engage with them in a sexual manner without consent, to invade their privacy during changing times, or to trivialize their discomfort.